An Open Letter to My Parents

Dear mama and papa,

Did you ever hate me? I guess not. Of course, I am your daughter, you cannot hate me. Remember all the bad times we had? All the headaches I gave to you? You only beat me a belt and I hate you for doing that; and yet you still cared for me. You see me crying, and you asked for forgiveness. I ignored you for I hate the both of you. I hate you for giving me care. I hate you for giving me love. Remember when I ignored all your injunctions? You scolded me but you still say that you were sorry. Remember when I’ve got 79 grades in math? You became disappointed and yet you embolden me that I must try my best for the next term. Remember when I’ve got a boyfriend? You slapped me and yet you also say that you were sorry. Remember when I’ve got sick? You scolded me for I am reckless; and yet you exerted all your efforts to help me healed. Of all these absurd things I have done, why didn’t you abandon me? Why didn’t you just leave me outside our home and watched as I am dying? I had hated you for too long and yet you still loved me from aback? Why? I still had got no idea.

Time had passed, and still I had hated you. I’ve got no idea why. Even me, myself cannot figure out. Maybe I want to try living on my own. I want to try how cruel the world was having no one. It’s a lame but I want to be independent. I don’t want to be someone who will be crying for the one who had left. I don’t want love for it only gives expeditious ecstasy. I don’t want care for people will only be used to it. I also don’t want hate but my burdens gave that kind of sensation. I had hated you for such a lame reason. I’m sorry mama and papa.

 Remember all the efforts you gave was still worth it. I am now a third year college student; and I have changed. All the love you gave when I was still a baby until then, was still perceive. Of all the advises and sacrifices you have exerted, I become a better woman. All the bad things I have done, I thank you for not leaving me, for not abandoning me and leaving in the dark. Of all the cares you have flaunt, I have learned my lesson. I ain’t an island to be alone but I am a creation and I was born to be forsaken. Thank you mama and papa, for giving me this wonderful life. I love you.